Yodster

According to Marius Panzarella,
a dating coach, there are 3 levels
in a man’s life, regarding to
their "Romantic Intelligence"

www.datingsupportcenter.com

1.Discovery
2.Experimenting
3.Mature

* The clumsy boy

It’s when the teenager suddenly
realized, he started to like girls,
that’s when he felt struck by the
arrow of cupid.

He can only think the face of his
girl. He still believe in love at
first sight, first love never die,
all that stupid stuff.

"Hello…eh…hmm, hi…
nice to meet you, girl, hhh…
what’s your name?"

That’s their pickup line.

Hmmm, remember Peter Parker
when he was in high-school.
He practiced in front of mirror
"Hi, MJ…" with a goofy smile.

This where all soon-to-be gentlemen,
acted silly, often get rejection as
they haven’t learned yet on how
to attract girls.

They thought of what they did as
something special, but actually
odd in the eyes of girls.

* The cool guy

Then experiences taught him.

Not to reveal the feeling to soon
in the beginning.

Instead of saying, he should show
his feeling, with real actions
that can be understood and acceptable
to the girl he likes.

He realizes which ways work and which
don’t. Never repeat the same mistakes
in phrases or attitude.

He become an expert in woman-ology.
Knowing the secrets on how to touch
her heart and …

It depends on each men.

Some remain as flirt-master "forever"
(for longer years, actually)

Some then realized that fooling
around as player will only waste
his time, money and… feeling too
(if he has any)

"Hello girl, my name is …<name>
and I am …<attribute>
So tell me a little about yourself."

* Family man

After years of lessons, rejected,
able to date, follies in relationship
with some drama queens, then he will
realized one day.

That "one day" is relative for
everyone, though.

That he wants to be with a woman
he really can accept, feel compatible,
secure and … simply, who he loves.

To stay together, get married, have
kids and be a family.

This is where questions getting serious.

"So, tell me… can you cook?"

Don’t laugh, just read until finish.

"Do you think we can be together?"

Oh, and the most long-waited phrase
by the ladies

"Will you marry me?"

Okay, do it in a very special place.
At the beach, mountain, fancy restaurant
or… wherever you think she’ll like it.

***

Here are the problems.

Some girls, ladies or women…
they don’t know the type of male
they are dealing right now.

They felt that all men are so …
<what? Tell me, please>

You can’t expect him to propose
you when he’s still enjoying
the evening with his buddies.

You can’t force him to get into
a serious and commited relationship
while he is still a player.

Or… expect him to be more fun
and talk about "it" later,
wait, next year perhaps… as you’re not
ready to become his wife.

He can suddenly walk away,
and you’re complaining!

***

Why is he gone?

Maybe, here are some good reasons:

- He felt that you’re "too strong"
He’s intimidated with your approach.

- You are just too … for him

Here are the list of words:
demanding, aggresive, cruel, smart,
emotional, extravagant, high-maintenance,
skinny or fat, and mature?

Hey, I’m not using the word "old"
here. Please, don’t be upset…

- He didn’t know how to contact you
and too shy to ask you your phone number.

- You’re giving him confusing signals.
Or wrong responds that make him thinks
that you’re not interested.

- He has found a better one and you’re
just a name on his list of candidates.
A backup plan, just in case the other she
he’s dealing now is suddenly screwed-up.

- You are also still a player and he
can smell it. You’re red-handed caught
while being with another guy. And off
he moves on!

- He’s ready to propose you as his wife
but you always avoid the topic as you
still enjoy your career and wild parties
every weekend.

- You both are different in almost
everything. AND…nobody wants to compromise.

- He’s bored or offended with what you
once did or said, whether you realized or not.

- You reluctantly reply to him and he
understood that you just need space
to be on your own. Every time he phoned,
your voice tone is cold, plain and
indifferent. He thought that it’s useless
to speak with you anymore.

- He’s attached with his mom.
And you’re only number two, then suddenly
you said something unpleasant about
an important member of his family.
Think again, who’s the real b**ch now?

- You are busy. Life is about priority.
If you really want to do something,
you will give time for it. So does
when you always give him this reason.

- He thought of you as ALWAYS AGREE
or ALWAYS DISAGREE with him.

Whatever reason, you know it better
as you’re the one facing the situation

***

That’s man-ology.

Girls, learn something from here.

Tell your girl friends to visit my site.

Why am I asking this?

Don’t you know that there are ways
to spread a message. You can use telephone
or telegram. No, telescope not.

But the quickest method is to use:
Tell-a-woman.

Haha! Come on, send the link of this
blog to them.

+ yoDi +

Are you an impulsive buyer?

You can’t resist yourself,
whenever you see something nice,
you quickly take it to the cashier
and… after you’re home you wonder

"Why do I buy these things?"

This is what you should do:

Have self-control.
"Do I NEED this, or do I WANT this?"

Bring limited cash.

Walk out of the store, or move
to other section, so you can think clearly.

Make a note of what you must buy.

Eat before shopping, you’ll buy more
when you’re hungry.

Buy item for its quality and durability.
Don’t buy merely for trend or fad,

Expensive isn’t always bad.
Better to buy one with higher cost
but could lasts for year, then a cheap one
but then broken in only a month.

Years ago, Tamagotchi is a fad. But now,
who still plays it?

There were times people crazy for F4,
they buy collectible items and imitate
their hair-style, their songs, etc.
Now…do you still remember their names?

These days the square-shaped watch
is in high demand, but who knows in
next 3 months?

Don’t fell easily on discounts.

One item $500
Buy three $1000 and extra one

Actually the real price is $250.
By doing that, the seller earns more profit
if you only buy one. And if you are persuaded,
you actually buy four, though maybe you only
need to have one.

"Back on popular demand, discount prolonged
until…"

If it’s really popular, it’s should be sold-out
yesterday. Discount is given to make the
old items sold, better to earn little profit
than to let those stored at warehouse only.

Know what you buy,

This was about you, Christine…
Go on, please…

***

Is it for PLEASURE or BENEFIT?

If you’ve been following my blogs,
then it must be familiar.

Just as in relationship, what are you
seeking in someone?

Now this is the connection of the title
and the content… we can compare between:

Advertising and love-letters

Promotion and dating

Buying and marriage

Think carefuly before you decide
to have something. If you buy wrong item,
maybe you can re-fund or at least waste
your money.

But if you choose to be with the
wrong person, ouchhhh…

A life-time full of regret would
be the cost.

Are you still reading?

Writing love-letters, sweet talk, romantic SMS
or that kind of stuff are ways for you:

- To inform, explain about yourself.
- To be reminder, as "brand-awareness"
- To make your loved-one becoming loyal
(loyal… somehow, I’ll explain later)
just as ad made to increase customer’s loyalty

But loyalty must be supported with good
quality, not just good promotion or promises.

Don just talk, show them with act…
That you really have a good product
(that you are worthy for your loved-one)

Make your promotion interesting, always
be remembered… and in the end, you make
them buy… (dating to marriage)

Now, how are you going through this process?

Don’t be tricked easily. All that glitter
isn’t always gold. Don’t regret it later
when you’ve got married, and you realize
that the person isn’t as promised.

Of course, that was just comparison,
people are people, cannot be seen as product.

Remember my blog about Relationship.
The longer you know someone,
the more you can tell as described in
this Chinese proverb:

We knew the strength of a horse
after long journey.
We knew the quality of someone
after long friendship.
(Chinese proverb)

***

These are types of product, ooops…
I mean people… that you should consider
of avoiding:

- Cheater
You can’t rely on this kind of person.
Flirt here and there and take relationship
so light as a pinch of salt.

No need further explanation.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7rDyUGebqIk

- Gold-digger
Always think of how to get rich quick and easy,
but have almost no effort. Trying to get
big money by unrealistic method such as MLM
or money-game.

Always want the other to pay for everything.

Doesn’t have a real job that can be relied
upon, always change job every three months.

Lazy, only think how to consume but rarely
think or work on how to earn money.

Listen to this…

http://youtube.com/watch?v=d7_7he9bi-Q

- Desperate
Always see things as if the sky will fall.
Life sucks, always complaining and never
put any effort on how to make it better.

"Oh… let it be…in the end,
all we must die."

- Problematic
Has problem with eating, trying to be
very slim and put their own health at danger.

A junkie, addicted to hazardous substances.

Alcoholic, chain-smoker, drug abuser, gambler, etc.

Hate almost everyone, even their family
members and avoided by friends.

"WHHAAATTT?!! Don’t try to change or fix me!
It’s me, who I am…"

Familiar with their whine?

It’s controversial, there will be pro and con,
so it’s your choice to believe what I wrote
or write me a flame of disapproval.

- Immature

Always right, and you’re always wrong to them.

Chronic level of narcissism and very self-centered,
all is about me.. me.. me…

Angered or depressed easily. Can throw
stuffs when in fury or threaten with knife
to cut their wrist whenever there’s conflict.

Live in fantasy, can’t tell the difference
between dream and reality.

It’s me… me.. me… me always first,
and the last is also about ME!!

***

How about cyber-dating?

It won’t work for the long term.

You must know the person in person,
face to face. No, not through web-cam.

If you can’t see them in the real world,
it means you can’t touch them and you’re
going nowhere further but merely having
constant correspondence.

Be aware… people often fake their identity,
personality and have tall-story about their life.

If you’re under-age, then have an adult to
accompany you… avoid invitation to personal
place, meet in public area for initial contact.

You never really know until you can see
the person. And… I mean, in an open space,
together at the same time and place.

Web-cam? No, it’s not enough.

Hey, Gholack… you should read this one!

***

So what are the good qualities?

- Loyal, not easily change feeling or
decide to love based on mood.

- Frugal, productive instead of
consumptive. It’s not the same as stingy.

For business, you must count every penny,
but not to argue neck to neck with your
partner "Who must pay the meal this time?"

- Positive, it doesn’t mean you are perfect
and don’t have any problems. Be optimistic and
don’t quit easily.

- Mature, it means… you have problems
and you can handle it. You know you are
important and worthy, but other people
are also important and worthy.

Remember this tagline, when you buy
an original piece of VCD/DVD?

"Respect yourself, respect others."

- Clean, not a junkie, take a bath at least
twice a day, honest and have balanced life-style.

Is there anyone like that?

I remember Richard Templar wrote in his
RULES OF LIFE:

"Couples that can last strong together are
consist of two people who are strong as
individual when apart and can adjust to
each other also be strong when together."

I’m paraphrasing, more or less… like that.

It means… you’re an independent person
and not becoming too dependant to your partner.

Each of you have your own wish, ambition or vision.
But both don’t restrict each other, instead
you admire and support what the other is doing.

The other can make you feel fun, comfortable,
secure and know that life can goes on
when you’re alone but it felt more
complete with the other by your side.

So… have you find that special one?

***

Or… maybe you’re asking:

When is the right time to start it?

It’s when you’re not needy, not desperately
looking. When you’re calm and able to use
both heart and mind…

In ebb of water, the rock can be seen.
(Chinese Proverb)

When you think clearly, problems can be solved.

Think clearly before you buy.
Don’t easily swayed by promo or ad.
Learn everything about it before it’s yours.

Ask again:

Do I WANT it or do I NEED it?
Is it for PLEASURE or BENEFIT?

The same principles also applied in
finding your true-love.

+ yoDi +

Make it better.

More than words.

Giving added value.

Something different and new
that can help to improve your…

Aaah, that’s too long!

Hey, I’m trying to arrange a sentence.
Just make it short and simple,
this is what copy-writers do.

They read, got inspired and then
they re-compose the phrases.

Sometimes, they just write-down
what exactly their clients want.
How easy, they got paid for only being
a copy-writer, literally just copying!

Where do I begin?

Let’s make it simple to be remembered:

KISS MY ASS!

Keep It Short & Simple,
Make Your Audience Smile,
Sell!

I’m making this tagline as motto
for the Selling Crews in my company.
I’ll train them, simply like this:

- Brief and easy to be understood
when you’re doing presentation.

- Be nice, make the customer happy.
Talk to them, listen and be friendly.

- Don’t forget the main task.
Don’t chat too long, in the end
offer them to buy:

KISS MY ASS!

Sounds familiar?

* * *

A friend, she currently work
in an advertising agency, offered
me to meet her boss.

They want me as their copy-writer,
as freelance for the starting.

They want me to write their company profile.

Tall order, isn’t it?

Yeah, I’m working on it.

No, I didn’t. I’m working on my blog
and as if I’m digging the soil of
phrases. Trying to find treasure:

The right sentence.

Actually what is right?

For creative people, sometimes
being right is wrong, and being wrong
is right.

Confused?

I’m paraphrasing from Paul Arden’s book
(It’s not how good you are, but how
good you want to be)

We are accustomed to think what’s right.
What is right? Right according to…what?

The convention, the tradition, the norms,
the things we used to know, etc.

Those things are killing your creativity!

Okay, let’s just use ‘limiting’
instead of ‘killing’.

Those things are limiting your creativity.

No ‘exclamation point’. They’re holding
the value of being polite, nice, creative
but not offending. They’ve just explained
about their business and I’m a quick learner.

Next…

Try to think outside the box.

(Honestly, I don’t like it when
people said that)

You can’t think OUTSIDE, until you’re
OK with thinking INSIDE.

That is, you’re using logic and phrases
that can be understood by anyone.

Then, after you can follow the rules of
thinking, you can try to modify,
or say.. break the limitation. Or use
adapt or adjust, whatever you like.

That’s when being wrong is right.

There’s no fixed rule. All laws are just
guidelines, so that we can adjust things.
And… yeah, the guidelines can be adjusted.

New ideas are treasure.

Though I believe there are no new things,
no secrets. Everything is already exist
there, it’s just not everyone realized it.

Just like Isaac Newton who sat and leaned
on an apple tree. Everyone can do that,
but not everyone can think about why
the apples hit the ground when they fell.
From there we learn about gravity
in schools.

By experimenting and doing something
never done before, you’re creating
(or use ‘discovering’ or ‘realizing’
if you prefer) that it can be done.

* * *

Now what’s the result?

In magazines, it’s clear… articles.

How many pages?
The content? The message?
How’s the photo and design?

In copy-writing, you only have limited space.
Write one sentence, only. Use simple
words but must contain deep meaning.

That’s the challenge.

You only have… let’s say 30 seconds
to speak of who you are, what you’re doing
and what you can do to help others.

It’s like in Miss Universe contest,
where those beauties are tested to answer
in a very short period.

Or the same as leaving good first impression.
You can say it verbally, or show it
through non-verbal language (body language,
gesture, face expression, voice intonataion,
context and situation, etc)

It’s like making the first paragraph
of a headline. Or making title.

Oh, are you still reading?

I’m taking you into my mind, now…
I’m having a brain-storming session
with you now.

* * *

This is how it works. Let’s start
by being philosophical.

There are different levels of needs.
Let me remind you of Abraham Maslow
and self-actualization doctrine he made.

Also from Gordon Allport, that we
all must do self-extension.

That is, to realize who we are now,
accept and acknowledge it. (REAL SELF)

Then to aim higher than who you are now.
To have dream, plan and ambition to
become a better person. (IDEAL SELF)

Betweeen those, there are process.

Most people, they don’t know where
they stand right now.

Hey, you’re reading this while you sit,
right? Why don’t you stand up now?

*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Just kidding, please sit again and
read further…

That’s what copy-writers do.
They formulate what is what, and
who is who, then who need what.

They sell stories. That’s why
SETH GODIN claimed in his book title:
All Marketers are liar.

Many years ago, our ancestors never
use soap. Then soap is invented.

Next..we DIFFERENTIATE and make
PRODUCT EXTENSION.

We have shampoo, for hair. Soap is only
for the body. Then soap for face is
different, we know Facial Cleanser now.
Then we know Pore-pack to clean your nose.

And shampoo… now we have conditioner!

Imagine from snail-mail, to e-mail.
From beeper to SMS service.
Ordinary phone and now… with camera!

Do those stuffs make you better?

New invention arise and not all
realize that. The company wants people
to know and in the end… BUY!

What’s the use of advertising?

To give the message (Communicate),
telling what’s their product (Inform),
teach them how to use it (Educate),
convince them to choose it (Persuade),
suggesting them to use more (Add Use Frequency),
explain the product (Create brand awareness),
and make people always buy from them
(Create customer loyalty)

Those in brackets are from books of
marketing. I’ve read many, more or less
that’s all about it.

Now, what will we do?

Artistic Department deals with photo,
image, animation, colors composition, etc.

Script writer do the text, what’s written,
must be spoken and can be viewed or heard.

Together they combine their kung-fu,
like crouching tiger and hidden dragon.

HOOoooo… yaaaAAA!!!

You may didn’t know what happened when
the think-tank were having meeting.

Maybe you never know also that sometimes
they don’t think, they just re-wrap
the sentences given by the client,
re-touch the images ordered too.

After several presentations, the concept
must be chosen, then executed!

In the end… the posters printed,
the ad published on magazines,
heard on radios and broadcasted
on TV stations.

* * *

I must stop it now.

Thanks for reading, hope you’re
learning something today.

I must finish the order to
make their company profile.

Articles, poems, blogs, and now…
copy-writing.

Oh, also I’m finishing my book.

Ciao!

+ yoDi + 

What is it that you’re good at?

This would be as simple as the question.

Potential, ability, intelligence,
gift, knack, specialty, mastery, expertise.

Those are the synonyms.

I started to think to write this,
after a friend of a friend of a friend
(See… it’s FRIENDSTER effect,
anyway she’s a friend of mine too now)
asked me…

What is "Being Smart" means to you?

Lamris, questo BLOG è per te…

* * *

What is smart?

- To know what you know and don’t.

- To acknowledge what you didn’t know yet
and willing to learn, if you must.

- To be able to apply knowledge and
make money from what you’ve learned.

- To be able to teach what you’ve mastered
to others with simple words so that can

be understood easily without demeaning anyone.

- And, to be able to communicate it
to other people from different experties,
minimize jargons so all can cooperate well.

- And, also through writing as it’s my talent.

Now two quotes from Confucius:

"To understand what you’ve learned and
to acknowledge what you didn’t know,
that’s the essence of knowledge."

"The dimmest ink on paper
is better than the sharpest memory."

And… from King Solomon:

"To fear The Lord is the beginning of wisdom."

* * *

If you’ve been reading my BLOG,
then you probably still remember
8 types of Multiple Intelligence:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiple_intelligence

Another theory make categorization
of people based on talents in work-place.
There are six types:

1. Realistic
You can count, use logic, have limited
creativity but prefer to say

"What’s in it for me? and them?"

"How much is the cost …?"

"Is it possible?"

Accountant, Entrepreneur, CEO, are
what your career will be.

2. Investigative
Detectives, Judges, Polices, Journalists,
Researchers, Scientists.

Are you curious?
Are these your questions?

"How can it happen?"

"Why…?"

"What will happen next?"

3. Artistic
Wow, you’re dreamy, full of fancy ideas.

"Listen… wait, what did you say?
Wow, you’ve just inspired me."

"Yes, I will do it, when the mood is right.
I need my Muse to spark the idea."

"Cool! That’s beautiful. One day, I’ll create
something like that, but of course I’ll
do it better."

Anything artistic can be yours to do.

4. Social
Do you like to have chit-chat? Many said
you’re warm, gentle and very cordial.
You should be Selling Crews, Customer Service,
Usher, Phone Operator or Public Relation.

"May I know about your ….?"

"Your hair look so cute, where did you cut it?
Oh, by the way, how’s mine? You know, there’s
a new restaurant in town. We should try…"

"Hi, nice to meet you…"

(And the chatter goes on and on)

5. Entertaining

Remember a name who can make you smile.

Many can remember a joke,
but not all can make people laugh.

This is where "Story-Telling Intelligence"
must be developed. You can either be a real
comedian or just a speaker with good jokes.
Or a friend who can be clown.

You mixed-up words, twist the logical,
play with synonyms, homophone, homonym, and…
no, don’t think about the next homo
on your mind, please…Or next, my BLOG
will be given a certain rating.

Watch out for humor, there are several
situations where you must be serious.
Know who’s your audience first.

"A woman only have to know one man just
to understand that all men are the same.
But a man, even he knew all women, he
still can’t understand, not even one!"

"If a vegetarian only eats vegetable,
then a humanitarian is …"

"Pernikahan tidak adil bagi wanita.
Mereka selalu jadi korban pemerasan,
diperlakukan seperti sapi perah,
mulut mereka disumpal, berada dalam
keadaan tertekan dan posisi terjepit.
Meski demikian, mereka tak mau melapor,
padahal pelakunya sering tertangkap basah."

(If you understand Indonesian, you’ll laugh,
if you really get what it’s really meant)

But… in Wikipedia link there, the E is Enterprise.

Please read there for the explanation.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holland_Codes

6. Conventional
You just do routine job, and that’s it.

Boring? Yes, for some people.

But somebody must do the job.

* * *

Now after figuring out what you’re good at…
What would you do with your talent?

5 P and 5 D, you’ll remember easily!

1. Practice
Learn the theory, from sources you can trust.

Always explore, once you’ve done with
the basic knowledge, learn some more
through rehearsals.

2. Perform
So, you’ve finished a book about magic tricks,

then you should let your friends watch you bend

the spoon, guess correctly what’s on their mind, etc.

Only by making your talent be known,
then you’ll be recognized, have your name
mentioned, be popular, etc.

3. Promote
Tell your friends to tell their friends
about what you’re good at. Show them,
make them impressed, you’ll be remembered
and… who knows?

Example:
If you like my BLOG, tell them to visit
my profile and read it. No, not my profile
and testimonials, but my BLOG.

4. Price
Once you’re becoming professional,
then you can mention how much money
you want for someone to use your talent.

Know the range, have a survey first.
Then you won’t be considered as
too cheap or too high maintenance

5. Produce
Talent is an asset. See in my previous blog
about richness and how to create asset.

It will be called asset if it helps you
to produce something and make money.
So, have you really produce something
from what you’re able to do?

6. Demonstrate
Build reputation and trust. Show them who
hire you that you really are someone they
can rely upon.

No, don’t use words merely. Show them
with your action, result and quality.

7. Develop
Complacency, pessimism and perfectionism
will poison your talent.

Always ask for more.

Don’t quit easily.

You can’t be extremely good at everything.
Be a specialist. Mistakes can happen,
then learn from experience.

Thus… you are developing!

8. Discipline
Sun Wu Kong, the monkey king has very great
power, strength and magical ability.

However he must be tamed, whenever he became
ferocious and start to disobey his master,
The Priest will chant a prayer and
suddenly the half-animal fell and roll-over…

"Ouch! So hurt, my head… Aaahhh…
Master, pleeeeaasseee stoopppp…
I regret it.Enough…"

Remember this episode from JOURNEY TO THE WEST?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Journey_to_the_west

Paul Gascoigne, is reckoned as a great talent
in English football. But he admitted when
he got retired that he’s just a joke.
Yes, he’s talented but also lack of discipline.

Some years of his productive age were wasted

on staying in rehabilitation centre due to abuse

of alcoholic drink and drugs.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Gascoigne

Now I’m not giving you any discourse here,
please just conclude yourself.

9. Discuss
So you’re an expert now. But there are
others alike of you. Some are already
years experienced, some are newbies.
Know where your stance now in the
professional associations.

Join a group, it can be mailing list,
where you "meet" people of your kind.
Share the common interest and exchange
knowledge or stories there.

Be open-minded to people with different
talent, learn from them also. You can’t
work alone, respect each other and
each other’s talent.

10. Devote
Concentrate, focus, be totally for it.

When you learn a new language or anything,
then have something or someone to be your
raison d’etre (reason to exist).

It will motivate you, trust me…
Oh, have you read my previous BLOG: Italiano?
Li, puoi sapere perche voglio imparare
la lingua (There, you can know why I want
to learn the language)

We know Michael Jordan as a legend of
basketball. No, golf is just a hobby
he played after he’s not too busy.

Know what’s your real talent to be
in serious handling and polishing,
and those which are only leisure activities.

Be exist with your real talent and
be loyal to it. Then soon… yes,
you’ll be someone. No, not just someone
like anyone.

But be somebody with something people will acknowledge and remember.

* * *

Yeah, you better start to think about
all these today. Yes, now, adesso!

What? You don’t have time, you said?
Or still don’t know who you are and
what’s your real talent.

Then I must let you think about it now.
Tell me, when you’ve done it.

+ yoDi +